This one's gonna hurt

I dig my heels into the dirt, 'cause this one's gonna hurt.
Won't let the waves wash me away, is what I always pray.
I'm held hostage in my head with every word you say.
God, all those lessons in my past, I spit them out so fast.
I see myself with you, I act so small.
I see my self with you, I always crawl.
So someone leave a raft for me,
the water's getting deep.